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If he adhered to this policy—to keep away from her inconspicuously—she would forget the name by night, and to-morrow even the bearer of it would sink below the level of recollection. If only sometimes he would grow angry at her, impatient! But his tender courtesy was unfailing; and under this would be the abiding bitterness of having mistaken gratitude for love. I had not seen the courtyard in many years and I was happy to dream of those times. He fended these things off from him with the rump of his fourth piece of cake. When he recovered his mental faculties, he would lie there, neutral; they could save him or let him die, as they pleased; and the doctor knew that he would wear himself out forcing his own will to live into this neutrality. Perhaps this was the real turning point: the hour in which the disordered mind began permanently to readjust itself. He was so depressed and disheartened that he did not then believe he would ever write again. “How dare you!” They were both astonished at the other’s strength. Naturally it all came out then. “You blithering idiot!” he exclaimed. “I’ve plenty of pals,” he said, “who, when they’ve been doing Paris on the Q. She would write to Gerald. “Quite an unimportant one,” he assured her.

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This video was uploaded to waterscolumns.info on 12-09-2024 15:11:56

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